Monday, April 26

Happy Late Resurrection Of Jesus

I never made an Easter post, so although it's incredibly late. 

Happy Resurrection Zombie Jesus, Thank You For Dying for Our Sins & Then Commissioning A Giant Rabbit to Break Into Peoples Homes & Hide Oval Shaped Food Everywhere So That We're Still Finding It Years Later, Which Makes Us Reflect On The Glory That Is The Long Weekend & That Time My Mother Threw My Sister Down The Stairs in an Effort To Win an Easter Eggs Hunt. That Was Awesome. 

Monday, April 12

Hands Off The Freak Show.

In some smutty celebrity news, everyone and their dog has probably seen pictures of Heidi Montags gross stone face by now, the girl had about a million surgeries so that she could ditch the vibrant young look for the sad slopped together remains of any other former starlet with an immobile forehead. She appeared on Ryan Secrest the other day to grace the public with stories of all of the completely unnecessary surgeries she underwent, 

Secrest: Let's go back to your breasts.
Montag: Haha great!
Secrest: No pain associated, right?
Montag: No
Secrest: But when you hugged me, you kind of hugged softly.
Montag: Well I'm very weird about hugging people now because I've had so much done that if somebody accidentally bumps your nose or your face...
Secrest: It falls off?
Montag: I'm very careful. I'm very fragile. 

She has to avoid human contact?! How in Gods name does she have sex with that slimy husband of hers? They must have to put a glory hole in the giant bubble I imagine the rolls around in at home. But seriously, it's pretty sad that at 20something she took apart her entire face and chest so that she could walk around looking 50 and avoiding human touch. 

Plath Love.

"Mad Girl's Love Song" By Sylvia Plath

I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead;
I lift my lids and all is born again.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

The stars go waltzing out in blue and red,
And arbitrary blackness gallops in:
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead.

I dreamed that you bewitched me into bed
And sung me moon-struck, kissed me quite insane.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

God topples from the sky, hell's fires fade:
Exit seraphim and Satan's men:
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead.

I fancied you'd return the way you said,
But I grow old and I forget your name.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

I should have loved a thunderbird instead;
At least when spring comes they roar back again.
I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead.
(I think I made you up inside my head.)

Custom Etsy Shopping

I love that the home page on Etsy features items found using specific key words, so I did the same thing by searching "Dainty Things", here are some Dainty Things:

Ink & Button Felt Floral Headband

Hand blown Perfume Bottle by Modish Vintage

Alice in Wonderland Inspired Pillow by Nuka

Sleepy Bunny by Sleepy King

Crochet Blanket by Rocket & Bear

Apple Pendant Necklace by Market Store Shoppe

Monday, April 5

Happy & Healthy, Strong & Calm.

I've been a Tegan & Sara fan for awhile now, I've also heard the song "Where Does The Good Go" a few times & haven't ever thought it was particularly good until recently. I found a live version that's really amazing & includes some relatively witty commentary from the girls, which is nice to see.

Sunday, April 4



I love Woody Allen, I've seen Annie Hall about billion times. I think he's so incredibly brilliant that i can even forgive his pedophiliac tendencies, & i rarely forgive celebrities for their indiscretions. Laura Bush Killed someone. Look it up. Anyway, here are a few amazing Allen quotes.

"She wore a short skirt and a tight sweater and her figure described a set of parabolas that could cause cardiac arrest in a yak."
"If it turns out that there is a God, I don't think that he's evil. But the worst that you can say about him is that, basically, he's an underachiever."
"Some guy hit my fender, and I told him, 'Be fruitful and multiply,' but not in those words."
"Organized crime in America takes in over forty billion dollars a year and spends very little on office supplies."
"Hey, don't knock masturbation! It's sex with someone I love."
"Harvard makes mistakes too, you know. Kissinger taught there."
"I was thrown out of N.Y.U. my freshman year  for cheating on my metaphysics final. I looked within the soul of the boy sitting next to me."